Tractor Disaster! The big bang theory

My best friend is one of those girls who has balls…

I know this doesn’t sound very lady like but let me explain. When we were in High school we had to go do a practical training period of one week at another school, usually in the northern part of Holland where we wouldn't sit in a classroom but drive tractors, milk cows and do stuff “for real”. This training would be one week long and when we finished that week we would return to our own school and get new theoretical things to study.

And because we went to a High school especially for the Agricultural sector there were a LOT of boys and not so many girls…

Kamie was awesome driving the tractor, not like me as you can read in Tractor Disaster & Tractor Disaster, Driving in Circles, but really really good! Of course the boys thought they were better and so it would be amazing to see her jump on the tractor with tanker, put it in reverse and back it up 500 feet true an overhead door, with no more than a couple of inches to spare on each side of the tanker, into a barn… You should see the faces of those boys when she would do that… pure jealousy, pure lust (after all it where teenage boys) and pure and utter disbelieve that a GIRL was capable of doing such a thing with a tractor!

I just stood by and watched ‘my girl’ do her thing…

In high school we also had to go to a local farmer and spent one day a week for half a year on their farm. This was believed good for your education because you could practice the things that you had learned in class on that farm and ask the teacher or farmer questions that might arise.

I went to a dairy farmer… can you believe it… and I would help him milk in the morning, feed the cows, clean the (free stalls) beds and helped the farmer with whatever needed to be done that day. I was pretty determined to do it right and after a couple of weeks; the farmer asked me if I could come in the weekends too. I thought this was a good idea, learn more about dairy farming and make some money, so one day I could buy my own BMW (hehe…)!

On a beautiful spring day, after milking was done, the farmer asked me if I could drive a tractor. I told him “yes, I can…”. I also explained to him that I didn’t do so well on my final exam but that I had been doing some practicing and that every day that went by I felt more comfortable, not as comfortable as my best friend (i told him about the boys and her driving) but comfortable enough...

Don’t tell me I didn’t warn him…

Soooo, long story short, he put me on the tractor to spread the grass he was cutting. My tractor had a machine (rake) behind it which you normally would use to make nice little rows (dunes) of cut grass, but instead of me making nice little dunes I needed to spread the grass around, this is called 'raking'. Imagine that the grass he cuts is laying in a nice little neat row, but no air can get underneath that pile of grass, so I needed to drive over it and “spread” it over the entire field so a lot of air can dry the grass quicker. If the grass is dry enough, you take the same machine, but adjust it a bit and make nice little rows (dunes) again, so the farmer can bale it. Some people make little bales (normally for horses) or big bales (for cows) and feed this to their animals.

He had cut all the grass and I was just driving around in circles over the fields spreading grass, having a good time. I made sure that my tires were good and i wasn't bleeding… yeah…. And that I didn’t drive true any holes and stuff.

After lunch I headed back to “my field” and started up again. There were some posts in the field… normally this is not a problem, but I didn’t see the post until I was already past it… Which is no good…

I stopped the tractor immediately and to my amazement one of the rakes went already past the post and the second rake was right after that. So you had rake, post, rake.

My blond and healthy farmers instinct said, “Ok, just put the tractor in reverse and the rakes will go backwards and just roll out of that post again. My theory: roll in, you can roll out again… right???

Well, in theory it should have worked, except I forgot the PTO… a PTO is that thing that goes round and round which makes the actual rake do what it’s supposed to do. And you should NEVER put a tractor with a rake behind it in REVERSE…

There was a HUGE BANG!!! No not a little bang, or crack, NO A BANG that you can hear 5 miles away and the PTO, the tractor and the rake stopped and things were FLYING!!! And really, all the blood that was running true my body just stopped running… “OH, OH, OH…. What have I DONE???"  While I was recuperating, the farmer, who lived half a mile from where I was raking, came running up to me! Yes, Dejavu all over again…. PTO broke, rake broke, some wheels inside the rake broke.... disaster all over...

Important lesson to be learned here; NEVER EVER EVER put your tractor in reverse when your PTO is still on….

I was allowed to come back to the farm the next week. My school was called and their insurance was not happy with me… I brought the farmer a homemade pie…



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Tractor disaster! Driving in circles...

Oh, I was so happy!

It was my first time in this wonderful country named America and I LOVED every single moment of it!

Of course it was not only pleasure, you got to earn your way around (no matter where you go) and so I was “helping” my uncle and aunt baling hay for their horses.

Note the “helping”…

Feeding time at our farm








As you might know by reading Tractor Disaster (if you haven't yet, please do!) I was not the natural that I would have liked to be, but I had some more experience driving tractor back home in Holland and my uncle thought I was ready for the real work!

My aunt and uncle had a field a couple of miles away from the farm and it needed to "be done". Making hay bales is simple, first you cut the grass (usually done by a pro, my uncle, otherwise you have too much grass left standing in the field), you wait a couple of days or hours depending on the weather, you rake the grass (throw it around a bit so more air can get underneath and it will dry better) and then you make little dunes (rows of grass piled together so you can pick it up easily) where you can drive over with a tractor and baler and make hay bales!

And yes all of this gets done with a tractor and a piece of equipment and it really is, lots of fun… if you do it right…

My task for the day was making dunes (rows) of grass, so my uncle could come later in the day and start to bale the hay and we would load it up and bring it back to the farm. My uncle dropped me off in the morning, showed how everything worked and I started driving around the field.

Manure hauling on the fields








It was beautiful weather and I saw deer, flowers, birds and grass, grass and grass! I and was fantastic! The field was a bit rolling so I didn’t get the feeling I was doing the same thing the whole time, every hill brought something “new”… And the rows of grass were perfect and I really thought my uncle would be so happy to have these perfect rows so he would be done in a swiffy and have perfect grass bales!

Yep, perfect it was…
I don’t remember how many hours later, my uncle comes with the big tractor and baler and stops in the field.

HE JUMPS OUT AND COMES WAIVING HIS HANDS AND SCREAMING FROM THE TOP OF HIS LUNGS, RUNNING TOWARDS ME!!!

“Hmm, what is he doing…” I thought…
So, I stop. Turn off my tractor and get off…

“What do you think you are doing???” “Hmmmm, making nice perfect rows, so you can bale your hay???” (I am miss smarty pants) “YES”, he yells. “The rows are great but look at that tractor?!?” So I turn around and look at the tractor… and I don’t see anything wrong with it…“Just LOOK AT IT!” my uncle insists… And then I see it… The tire is flat… And not only is the tire flat, the rim is bent… And not just a little bent, NO COMPLETELY BENT…

"Euhmmmmmmmm…. how does that happen???” I ask him with a face as red as a lobster…

Did I tell you my uncle is a fantastic guy?

Harvesting grain and straw for our cows







He took a couple of (deep, very, very deep) breaths and explained to me that, THAT happens when you drive around for several HOURS with a flat tire…

Then I had to explain to him why I did not notice…
Well, I really didn’t know. Like I said, the field was not completely flat and I was just focusing so much on making these prefect rows and enjoying the nature and wildlife I just hadn’t figure out why I was leaning to the right like… A LOT!!! Not even when I switched from going round in right circles to making left circles…

My uncle had to get a whole new rim, and yes tire too, and I felt really, really bad. My uncle did let me “help” some more with the hay bales, but I didn’t drive too much tractor anymore those months.

And yes it is Friday so let's hop! Farm Friend Friday.... See the button (Yes i did it!) and the Social Parade (button will follow!!!)

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Tractor Disaster!

I love my live on the farm! But that doesn’t mean I am good at everything that I sometimes need to do as a farmer…

I have had multiple experiences with tractors and maybe it is safe to say I should stay away from tractors, or everybody around me should stay away from me if I’m trying to drive one!

Bastiaan in front of a tractor







When I was 16 years old I wanted to get my tractor drivers license.

In the Netherlands you just can’t go hop in a tractor and drive around your farm or on the road. If you get in an accident, get pulled over or do something stupid you are in serious trouble, with the police, mom and dad or the insurance company. And since I liked to do it all (not the get in trouble part)… I wanted to learn how to drive a tractor and get my license.

Across the road from us our neighbor farmer raised hogs and owned and operated crop fields where they grew asparagus. I used to work there every weekend, after school and on my vacation days and he had a tractor. I asked him if he could teach me how to drive the tractor after and during work and that way I could practice for the exam. After weeks and weeks of practice, with a very patient neighbor (i DID NOT have a natural talent) the day had come to do my written exam and driving test. The AG teacher from my high school came to my house and we checked the tractor and went inside to do the written exam.

I had studied really hard and had my mom and dad gave me “fake” tests to see if I could pass. I would pass every time! We were in our own kitchen and the teacher gave me the papers. I ended up doing the test 3 times!?! I was so nervous I couldn’t get the answers straight although I knew what they were! Eventually my mom vowed for me that I really studied hard and the teacher should let me do the driving test and he would see I could really drive a tractor… Maybe the cookies that my mom gave him helped too.

The teacher put some pillions out in the field and I was supposed to drive the tractor with trailer in a big S, drive straight, make turns, park the tractor and back up with the trailer and park in a designated area.

Well…. I did it…

The tractor were we feed all our
cows with.





But I hit my hand on the door handle and I didn’t go fast and it didn’t go smooth. When I got off the tractor I was very flustered, adrenaline rushing true my body, still incredibly nervous,  I went over to my teacher. He just looked at me, looked down and looked at me again. I had no idea what I needed to do next but he looked in SHOCK!

While I was standing there in front of him, awaiting my verdict, thinking about all the things I did wrong ( I didn’t run nobody over so it couldn’t be that bad???) I decided that if I didn’t get my drivers license this time I surely would get it next time because I would have better control of my nerves!

After 3 grueling minutes (I know it doesn’t sound long, but I can tell you it was!) he said that I had passed!

Whooohoooo!!! I was so happy, I hugged him and told him thank you!!! Then he said something I didn’t understand… “You better wash your face”.

Wash my face? Why would I was my face after driving a tractor???

Well, when I went inside and looked in the mirror, while my mom and the teacher were catching up, I saw that apparently i busted my hand open when I hit the door handle and because I was so nervous and sweating I tried to wipe away the sweat. I wiped the sweat away all right… but all over my face was blood from my hand!

I looked like I was killed, slaughtered and left for dead! No wonder my teacher looked so shocked!

Putting new sand in the barn every week with

a little tractor

I really don’t think I passed my tractor drivers license test if it wasn’t for my mom and her cookies and if my teacher didn’t feel incredibly sorry for me.

And since this is only the beginning of my disasters with lovely red/white/blue and green tractors I can tell you, there is more to come…

Happy Friday!!!

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